Thursday, June 12, 2008

How is Dallin doing?

I get that question a lot. Mostly he is doing well. He has sad times where he will come and sit on my lap and just be quiet for a while. Most of the time he looks for kids to play with to distract himself. He misses his little shadow that followed him everywhere! He use to have a built-in playmate and he misses that constant companionship. Lately he has been a little more dramatic than usual (and that's saying a lot) the melt-downs happen more often and are more intense. But overall he's doing really well.

He didn't want to sleep in his room alone for a long time, but we've had friends staying with us so it hasn't been much of an issue. He doesn't like to take baths anymore because he has to do it alone, so he takes showers instead. Adam is trying extra hard to give him more attention and he is starting to abuse it a little stretching his bed time for just another few minutes, and "just one more story dad", and on and on.

Every once in a while I overhear him talking to friends about what Garrett use to do and how he acted. Just the other day while riding home from our reunion we brought my little cousin Rebecca with us. Dallin told her several times about how Garrett use to say something and how they use to play together. He seemed very matter-of-fact about it.

Today I decided to make banana bread (a tough chore without my little buddy to help me-Garrett was the chef in our family) and asked Dallin to help. While we were doing it we started talking about Garrett. I asked him if he was sad and missed Garrett and he said yes. I told him that I missed Garrett too and sometimes that made me sad, but it was fun to remember the things Garrett use to do. So, we started remembering things about Garrett.

He loved to sing songs-any songs and many times with the wrong words like "Transformers, robots in the skies" (it's suppose to be DISGUISE).

Dallin and Garrett would always do the McDonald theme when they saw the golden arches-you know:"duh duh duh duh duh, I'm lovin' it!" They also did the funny song from Sesame Street (let's see if I can do this) "ma-na-ma-na, do-do-ba-do-ba, ma-na-ma-na, do-do-ba-do! " Then they would use the same melody and put in funny words like "banana bread, do-do-ba-do-ba, banana bread, do-do-ba-do!"

Dalllin misses doing many things with him like: Battling in the tub with cars and boats, 2 person computer games where the guys would fight, Garrett hanging on Dallin's back, Garrett following him around, and Garrett playing with Maura.

Funny things we remembered about Garrett: One day while walking home from the Woolf's house he picked up a pine cone from under the tree and said "Mom, look a pineapple!". He always said "Oh my freatin' dosh!" (oh my freaking gosh) and "Oh my het" (oh my heck)j

Foods Dalllin remembers Garrett loved to eat: Strawberries, pancakes, Oatmeal breakfast cookies, bananas, and beans

We will miss that cute little guy, but we sure do have some terrific memories!

Monday, June 9, 2008

The Phillip Russell Family

I finally found someone who has these pictures! I've been searching for pictures of Adam's family from the funeral and couldn't find any-thanks Sarah!

This is the first time in a couple of years Adam and his siblings have been together. We are missing Maura (she was asleep on someone's shoulder) and Jason's wife Bobby Joy (BJ) and their 5 1/2 kids.


Adam, Sarah, and Jason


Adam, Sarah and Jason about 30 years ago!

Dallin's hair looks just like Adam's in this picture!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Half mast for Garrett.

My son Dallin goes to Helen Keller Elementary School and I am part of the PTO. Garrett and I were at the school several times a week doing different things and he made some great friends. One of those friends is Bob-he keeps the school running and he is awesome! Garrett calls him "Bob the builder" and would give him a hug each time he saw him.

One day we were on our way home from the school and Garrett said; "*sigh* Mom, I just love Bob the builder!" it was so cute. They were good buddies Bob and Garrett.

The day Bob found out about Garrett he flew the flag at the school at half mast and said he didn't care if he got into trouble, Garrett deserved it!


We are so blessed to have such wonderful people who love us.

It's been a month since Garrett died. In some ways it seems so short and then again it feels like I've lived three life times in these few weeks. Some days are harder than others. Sometimes it physically hurts I miss him so much and at other times I'm not so sad and realize that life goes on and I have happy moments.

I don't know which are worse; the times when I am sad or the times when I am happy and then I feel sad (guilty?) that I'm not sad. It's a funny thing to try and figure out what to do. I know my life needs to go on but I don't want to forget Garrett and sometimes I think that if I'm not thinking about him and missing him that I am forgetting him. I know it's not right and that I won't ever forget him, but it's a hard thing to figure out how to feel. It is confusing... I'm confused, but the thing that makes everything easier are the great friends and family I have. Thanks!

We are still getting cards and letters and phone calls from so many people-thank you, it helps to know we are loved and remembered.