Today would have been his first day of Kindergarten! I'm sure he would have LOVED it.


Things I think Garrett would have loved about Kindergarten:
-Walking to school with Dallin.
-Meeting friends and playing on the playground.
-Reading.
-Being a helper to his teacher.
-Singing time.
-Learning to write (especially write his name-he was excited to be able to do that).
-Taking his lunch to school (he was really excited about lunch boxes).
-Having me come to his class.

I'm sure he would have loved everything about school. He was that kind of kid; excited, happy and enthusiastic about almost everything!

While in Wyoming, I found a lot of pictures of Garrett my dad had that I didn't. So, since I was scanning hundreds of pictures anyway, I added these and brought them home. I am just now going through them and organizing them then I'll get back to doing my Garrett book project.

I'm glad I did my mom's book. Along with really loving the book, I learned a lot more about Booksmart and found some short cuts that will make my Garrett book easier and look better.


These are a few of my favorite pictures I found:

Garrett (11/2yr. approx) and his Great Grandpa Jones



Hard to tell he is smiling with his 'binky' in, but I can sure tell by those squinty eyes.

I'm sure he and Great Grandpa Jones are having a grand old time together now....

Garrett when he was born and his Grandma Jones. They are spending some quality time together now too....


Love the smile on this kid, and the mischievous glint in his eye.


He had my hair...straight on top, very fine and a lot of it. I was never sure what to do with it. We stuck with the same haircut for a long time and sometimes (obviously) I didn't do it very well.


He loved to be a 'cool dude' with his brother (and his dad in this picture). He could never get the hands quite right....I like this much, much better.


I've spent a lot of time thinking about and missing my little buddy today. *SIGH*

I've been working on my "Garrett Book". It's taking a LOOONG time. I was hoping to have it done before we headed north for a visit, but it's just not going to happen.

I've been collecting pictures, stories and anything else I can find, scanning them and organizing for the last few months. I finally sat down a month ago to put it together. It takes a lot of emotional energy to do it. I realized that I also want to make sure I have everything in it that I want so I'd better not rush it. I'm the kind of person that needs to work on something, then put it away for a while, then come back to it with fresh eyes. It's a big project.

One dilemma I have is what kind of 'voice' to use. Do I write in the book in third person "He always enjoyed making things..." or do I write as if I was speaking to Garrett "You loved helping in the kitchen".

How should I write? I need to decide fast, because already I'm 130 pages into it! HELP!

Another Garrett Memory...

I woke up this morning remembering how Garrett would get up.

He wasn't big on sleep. He was usually the last one asleep and the first one awake. Many times we would tuck the boys into bed and 20 or 30 minutes later we would catch a glimpse of blonde hair and beady eyes peeking around a corner. We usually had to tuck him in bed 4 or 5 times every night.

In the morning he was easy to wake up (on the mornings that I got up first). I would go into his room and sit carefully on his bed and his eyes would pop open and he would jump out of bed like he was waiting for me and just pretending to sleep.

On the other hand he did like to take naps as long as he had a sippy cup. I remember him being really little-2 or 3- and asking for milk (signing it of course) and his blanket. I told him if he wanted milk in a sippy cup he needed to go take a nap. I gave him the milk and he picked up his blanket and went to his room and took a nap!

One vivid memory for me (this is what woke me up this morning) was Garrett getting up before anyone in the house. He was often awake at 5:30 or earlier. He would come into my room and stand at the edge of my bed (We have a really tall bed. He was eye level with me when I was lying down.)and stare at me. Often I would open my eyes to find us nose-to-nose and it scared me to death! If I didn't open my eyes with him just looking at me he would whisper "mom, mom" in a very soft voice. It would always startle me. He would do it sometimes if he woke up in the middle of the night. Rarely would he cry from his bed, he would come quietly into my room and whisper "mom, mom" and really get my heart thumping.

I sure miss that!

Garrett Stories

It's funny how time does strange things. Sometimes it seems to fly by and at other times it crawls so slowly. It seems like this year has gone in just a blink of an eye, but while we were trudging through it, it was a long year.

In this last year I've tried really hard to write down stories and memories I have of Garrett so I don't forget them...so I don't forget him. I've had other people send me their memories of Garrett and I treasure them. I put them in a safe place and pull them out when I want to laugh, and cry-of course.

Miss Marsha, Garrett's first preschool teacher and a friend sent me a letter today with some really wonderful memories she has of Garrett. Two full pages of memories-I love them. It was such a great thing to read today.

These are a couple of them:
One day when Bekki was dropping him off for preschool, she told him, "Tell Miss Marsha what you want to be for Halloween." And Garrett said matter of factly, "The Holy Ghost."

I can't think of Garrett without thinking of his cute blonde hair. His haircut fit him perfectly. And when I think of his hair, I think of the day he found one of the girls tiny little hair rubber bands on the floor during play time. he brought it to me and asked me to put it in his hair. I tried to talk him out of it, but h REALLY wanted it. As soon as I put it in his hair (he had a darling little pony tail sticking up on the top of his head), he immediately started showing off for the class making everyone laugh. He was having the time of his life making them laugh.

My friend Angie wrote of Garrett:
Whenever we would be outside and Garrett would see us, he would put on a huge grin and come running toward the kids. He would see me and say, "Hey Mitchells Mom!" It always made me smile to hear him say it.

One Sunday Morning I was getting Mitchell ready for Church. I was trying to talk him into wearing a stripped snap shirt. He kept telling me no, I don't want to wear it. I finally asked him why he didn't want to wear it. He said,"Because I really want to sit by Garrett today and he doesn't really like stripes so if I wear that shirt, I won't get to sit by him.

Our neighbor Nancy who lives across the street had some good stories:

Sister Yardley had some strange allure for Garrett. He loved to go over and talk with her. He would often look out the window and say "Mom, Sistey Yady needs me to go over to her house and help." She was so nice to let him come over and play. She said he always picked up after himself and then would tell her he needed a cookie before he went home.

On several occasions after getting out of the shower I couldn't find him. I had left him watching cartoons and he wasn't there. After searching the house I frantically ran across the street and found him happily eating Sisty Yady's cookies. I had to really get after him and tell him not to leave the house without telling me!

I could go on and on and on... I probably will sometime.If you have any fun (or silly, or scary, or sad) stories of Garrett I would love to add them to my collection. Please send them to me. It would make my day!

My Aunt Ellen sent these great pictures to me. We were remembering Grandpa Jones on his birthday this week. These pictures were taken at Grandpa Jones' funeral.

I hadn't seen these pictures before. Thanks Ellen, they sure did make me smile.


Love this face and the 'rock on' pose he would try to do. He would mistakenly use the ILY handshape instead. He thought it was so cool.


This is his super cousin Kylan. They were bestest buddies.


*Sigh*

Talking about Dallin and his new athletic cup and boys and their fascination with body parts reminded me of...."Wenis Man"!!

That's what Garrett called himself when he discovered the flap in the front of his undies. He flipped out his penis and ran around the house yelling; "Look mom, I'm Wenis Man!"

He made up the word himself. It must be a combination of Weenie and Penis....

**EDIT** My sister reminded me that for quite a while Garrett would ask people "Wanna' see my Wenis?" and when they would politely decline his follow up questions was always "Why not?". I think my brother in law, Kelly is still laughing about that one...

We laughed about it for days! We still do on occasion...


Okay, so the kid was preoccupied with body parts. Another funny story involving him and body parts was when we were visiting my sister Jennifer in Salt Lake City. My cousin Steve and his wife Marci and their kids were over playing and Marci needed to change Jackson's diaper. She went out on the back porch where the kids were playing and Garrett came over to watch.

He watched with a very serious face and then exclaimed, "My dad's penis is bigger than his penis. My dad's penis is bigger than all your penises!"

It still makes me laugh to think of that story and Marci trying to re-tell it while laughing uncontrollably!

Oh, that kid could make me laugh! He still does on occasion...

I missed Garrett on April 1st...I didn't get to say "Happy Teasing Day" to him! Bummer.

He was really excited last year to find some interesting things growing in our garden and loved showing it off!



I didn't tease anyone this year. I just couldn't muster the energy. *sniff*

Watch out next year!!

Pine apples

The other day I bought a pineapple at the store. Pineapples always remind me of Garrett (as do bananas, breakfast cookies, milk in a sippy cup, blankets on the couch, Wonder Pets, bubble gum...) and his great personality.

We love to go on walks and often end up at the park down the street. It has a pond with ducks we can feed, a small playground, lots of grass to run on and pine trees. Every time we would go we would collect pine cones for projects and to decorate with.

One day we were walking home from the park and Garrett was in front of us running, throwing rocks and hiding in the bushes to jump out and scare us. On the corner in someone's yard was a pine tree. As we got closer to the tree Garrett jumped out with such excitement in his face holding a pine cone and yelled "Look mom, I found a pineapple!!"

That's why pineapples remind me of Garrett. (Who named them pine cones anyway? What a silly name for them. I think Garrett is exactly right-they are pine apples.)

I was searching for a picture of us in the park, but I couldn't find one. So these are some fun pictures of a hike we took with some friends in Usery Park. We hiked with a lot of kids and a few adults. It was VERY exciting.

You can see both my boys in red sweatshirts. I always tried to find shirts that were the same color when we went on adventures. It made them easier to keep track of.

We made it all the way to the top! Garrett was bugged that his hair was in his eyes...

He had such an excitement about him. He was my little adventurer always ready for something fun to do!

There is a family in our ward that is very special to us, the Pew family. They are a little farther along in life than we are-their kids are mostly grown and gone-but for some reason we have a special attachment to them.

In church we tend to sit in the same area every Sunday. David and Laura Pew usually sat either with us or near us. Garrett loved Laura. He would find her and sit on her lap and have her read stories to him (he did that to several "grandma's" in our ward, but Sister Pew was something special.) Laura would often comment that Garrett reminded her of one of her boys when he was young.

(Side note: Garrett was such a friendly guy. He wasn't afraid to meet new people. At church he was the self appointed "greeter" and loved to stand at the door and shake everyone's hand. He was sad when people overlooked him and didn't shake his hand and thrilled when kids and adults would shake his hand and let him say hello...but I digress)

When Garrett died, it was really hard on Sister Pew. He was a special little guy to her. Recently Sister Pew lost her mother as well. We've become friends through sharing tears and hugs and stories.

A couple weeks ago she came to me and asked if she could borrow a family portrait. I was happy to loan one and she returned this week with these:


They are so beautiful! Her dad (who lost his wife) loves to do woodwork and wanted to do something for us. He enlarged the photos, mounted them and cut them out. He spent extra time on one just of Garrett.

Laura loved this picture. She said it seemed to capture his personality so well; the shirt not quite tucked in, the collar sticking up, his impish grin and most of all the cheerful glint in his eye.

We are so blessed with good friends who think about us! Thank you.

Dallin had a tough week. On Wednesday he came home from school without going to his Science club. I knew something had to be wrong-he LOVES Science club. When I asked about it, he said "I just don't feel like doing anything today mom. I am just sad." We talked more about what he was sad about and he couldn't really put his finger on exactly what was bothering him. He was just sad and didn't want to do anything or play with anyone. He just wanted to be home.

I can identify. Some days I'm just sad. I can't explain why, I just get sad. They are fewer and farther between than what they use to be, but some days I just don't want to go anywhere or do anything. I just want to be home and hide.

So, Dallin and I sat on the couch and watched television for a while until Maura bugged us too much and we went for a bicycle ride.

Some days you just have to be sad.

Tonight we went for a walk. It's a good Sunday activity that gets us out of the house along with our crazy dog and lets us all burn a little energy. We walked to the school (a couple of blocks away) then let the kids and the dogs run. We met up with a lot of friends and it was a lot of fun.

As it was getting dark, I called to Dallin and Adam and said it was time to head home. Then I started looking for Garrett. It was such a weird feeling. I was rounding up the kids and one was missing so I was scanning the playground before I remembered. Every once in a while getting a reality check is a little abrupt.

After we got home and were eating dinner, Dallin was talking about how much he misses Garrett. I'm glad he talks about Garrett often. Tonight he said he thinks we need to have a Garrett party. He suggests that on May 1st we have a party and invite our friends to play and remember Garrett.

It's a sweet idea. Dallin is a really thoughtful kid. I'm not sure I can do it, we'll see.